Tag Archives: family

Love and Marriage Go Together Like A…What?

29 Nov

Barbie, you make everything look so perfect...Childhood dreams!

I always love the plane ride back to Chicago, the solidarity and comfort of silently reading a new book, testing out a new ipod playlist, and the my favorite plane ride pastime of all—catching up on current events and research. The holiday season always reminds me of the concept of family, so I was of course drawn to TIME Magazine’s “Who Needs Marriage: A Changing Institution” cover article.

http://www.time.com/time/nation/article/0,8599,2031962,00.html

As Frank Sinatra such clearly sang,

“Love and Marriage.

Love and Marriage.

Go Together Like a Horse and Carriage.”

The concept of marriage is surely relevant in my generation. I find for majority of my friends (at least the nontraditional ones), it’s more a question of what if and why and when in relation to my professional career rather than solely who and a definite NOW. Cohabitation is much more socially acceptable. Couples move in together sooner maybe because the economy, maybe because they just don’t want to get married at all, and maybe because marriage is just that serious. It’s not that we think marriage is irrelevant, it’s because it is that relevant. Families aren’t typical. We see step siblings and half and half of step. We see same sex marriages and more adoptions. These are all things my generation seems to agree with.  The world seems much more untraditional and young people tend to gravitate towards that change and act accordingly. The consensus that we should all get married just to get married because, well, that’s just what people do doesn’t ring as true with my peers (a generation with a high influx of children of divorce).

AHHHHH!!!

I can’t count how many times I’ve heard someone say “I don’t want to get divorced” or “I’d rather date for several years just to be sure.” This doesn’t seem to be true of our parent’s generation. My parents were married in their mid-twenties. There was a shelf life and if you were a female over 30–uh, you kind of missed the train.

So Why Get Married?

There’s the religious aspect. We all know another part of it is for a show, a status symbol that you found someone important because you are important. That surely can’t be it.

Tradition, TRADITION!

Oh Tevye, you are so wise!

Personally I like the traditional aspect. Okay maybe the actual wedding is more for your parents and creepy uncle that you always seat far away from the kids table. Then again, isn’t pleasing your parents and grandparents important? My mom will surely cry at my wedding just as she did during my elementary school graduation. And high school graduation. And absolutely bawled during my college graduation. So I like the tradition not because I feel we will be united as one under God’s eyes or that it makes me feel cooler and worthy of love. I love the fact that it’ll make my mom tear up and my grandparents beam with pride.

Although marriage’s significance is less obvious today, marriage has surely not become obsolete. With the economic advantages, religious support, and traditional appeal, we’ll continue to see it. It might just look a bit different this time.